Perfectionism is not Holiness
Chip Chambers // UGA Graduate
“Chip, I think you have a control problem.”
I was jogging with one of my friends, telling him about how tough some of my classes had been and how discouraged I was. I was determined to fix the problem by simply studying harder, assuming that if I could just get my grades up, then surely the discouragement would go away.
My friend graciously pointed out how over the past several months, my initial reaction to my struggles had not been to approach my Father and ask for grace, but to try to fix them on my own first. My meticulous calendar-keeping, late nights studying, and fixation on my flaws were no longer just hard work. They had become a self-reliant perfectionism.
“Great,” I thought. “First he has to be a better runner than I am, and now he has to point out yet another area I need grace.”
The Holy Spirit was using him to gently ring the doorbell of my stony fortress of a heart before He had to show up with a battering ram. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, I knew my friend was right. I had to pray that day repenting from my self-sufficiency and turning in humility and dependence to Christ. It’s a prayer with which I’ve become well-acquainted.
The Pervasive Sin of Self-Reliance
We can slap a lot of positive labels on our self-reliance. Work ethic. Attention to detail. Striving for holiness. Outside of the church, the world simply calls it “perfectionism.”
It even creeps into our spiritual disciplines. We try to never have a bad quiet time, always be fervent in prayer, and always encouraging, not for the sake of honoring Christ, but so that we can think better of ourselves.
The natural inclination of our hearts is not to depend on the Lord more, but less. The flesh often argues that if we work hard enough, we can handle most of our issues on our own. Psalm 127:1 argues otherwise.
The Root of Perfectionism
The line between holiness and perfectionism, however, can often become blurred. Gospel-fueled labor, after all, is not a bad thing (1 Peter 1:14-16, 2 Corinthians 7:1, Hebrews 12:14) and distinguishing it from perfectionism requires looking deep within our hearts.
Holiness is inherently God-centered and founded upon a recognition that we are not, cannot be, and should not be in control. We have no right to take up control of our own lives, only our own crosses.
Perfectionism, on the other hand, fears disapproval from others, so it works to make itself uncriticizable. In fact, much of its worth ethic stems simply from a fear of failure. It hates group projects because it does not trust others. It is often sleep-deprived because it refuses to accept that God can keep the world spinning for 8 hours by Himself.
Ultimately, perfectionism is a direct affront to the sufficiency of the cross. It is the audacity to look at the supremely beautiful, transformative work of Christ and say, “that’s good, but not good enough.” Surely He needs our accomplishments and successes to do His work.
But He doesn’t. He just wants us.
Jesus did not say, “Come to me, all you who are heavy burdened, and I will give you maximum efficiency.” He offered rest. And there are some distinct differences between this restful, Gospel-driven, Spirit-empowered holiness and the flesh’s self-sufficient perfectionism.
3 Differences Between Holiness and Perfectionism
Ultimately, the difference between the two lies in their motivations and fuel sources. Does the power to change come from our own grit? Or from the Holy Spirit’s quiet torrent of grace? As we seek further dependence on the Spirit, here are three indicators of where our reliance truly lies.
1. Perfectionism is reluctant to reveal flaws. Holiness knows that the light is the only place they can be addressed.
Perfectionism fears that others might see our failures, so it hides smeared makeup, unmade beds, bad test grades, unopened Bibles, and candy wrappers behind a veneer of perfection. If we can’t actually achieve perfection, we will at least convince others that we have.
Holiness, however, is not interested in the appearance of doing right, but in actual righteousness. That righteousness often involves admitting our inadequacies to others and asking for help (James 5:16). Only in the garden of confession and accountability can genuine repentance grow.
2. Perfectionism fears insufficiency. Holiness fears self-sufficiency.
I am afraid of inadequacy. Ultimately it’s because my flesh seeks to find my worth in my own resume, not Jesus’s. Even when I am overwhelmed, my perfectionism scoffs at the desperate neediness of prayer (Psalm 86:1).
Holiness, on the other hand, humbly approaches the throne of grace begging for mercy, assured that it will be given because it knows the King’s character. Holiness knows that inadequacy does not limit a God whose power is made perfect in weakness, but rather provides a canvas for Him to paint a beautiful story (Romans 5:20). It is not complacent with sin, nor does it find its identity in sinlessness. It finds it in Christ’s sinlessness.
3. Perfectionism is restless and uncertain. Holiness looks to the cross and sees the words “it is finished.”
Perfectionists are sure that God loves some future version of themselves but cannot love them in their current state. They struggle with contentment because it feels like complacency. They feel the need to be perpetually pursuing, tirelessly striving towards some abstract standard. To be sure, there is a standard, but it’s not abstract. It’s impossible. And it was met on the cross, and there alone.
Holiness looks to the cross and knows that the standard is met. We rest not in our own perfection, but in our Savior’s. It is a beautiful contentment. This then frees us up to go attack sin and with a Gospel-fueled passion.
May we say with Paul, “I worked harder than any of them, though it was not I, but the grace of God that is with me”. May we pursue holiness in the power of the Holy Spirit. And may we forsake the vain pursuit of perfectionism.
Chip, a long-time Watkinsvillian and WFBCer, graduated from UGA in December, 2019 with degrees in biology and economics. He has served in Watkidsville and with the college teaching team while at Watkinsville, and will be attending medical school at the University of Pennsylvania in fall 2020. He enjoys puns, watching Planet Earth, and has a passion for people’s heads and hearts to both be full with the knowledge of Jesus, which is both conceptual and experiential.
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